A Neighboring Church
One evening this week, I decided to pay a visit to one of our neighboring churches. I had never visited this particular church before but have heard great reports of what God is doing with this congregation, so I decided to attend their midweek service and to just sit in and worship with them. What follows are some thoughts that were sparked as a result of this visit.
1. Ministerial Ethics - It was a struggle for me to even decide to visit this church. You see, traditionally it is often viewed as bad ministerial ethics for one minister or pastor to visit another church without some form of official invitation from that church. In years past and in the minds of many older ministers, this is a threatening move. According to them, “this pastor may be coming to recruit our people to his church or they are coming as spies to see what we’re doing.” To me, this mentality is outdated and ridiculous. But because I know that some have this view, I struggled with the thought of whether I should visit this church or not. Ultimately, I chose to rise above such idiotic and immature thinking and I chose to not allow this mentality to rob me of the blessing and experience of visiting our neighboring church. While I admit part of the reason for my visit was to observe what other churches are doing and how they operate, I would never “recruit” someone away from their church. I refuse to be bound to “OLD SCHOOL” ways of thinking.
2. Spirit Check – As I joined in the beautiful service that was being held, I immediately saw some elements in this church that caught my attention. The church had a very contemporary and appealing look to it. There was incredible lighting, audio and visual equipment. The asthetics of the church were very impressive. The praise and worship was lively, passionate and musically appealing to the ears. As I began to observe these wonderful elements and characteristics of this church, I started to feel something happening that I did not like. I started to feel myself becoming jealous of what they had. It was as if I began to feel threatened by some of the strengths that they possess. I began to pray but instead of rebuking or binding, I began to thank God for what he was doing in this church and for what He had blessed them with. As I began to thank God and praise Him for his work in this church, I sincerly rejoiced for them. It was definitely a spirit check for me.
3. Not All Strengths – As I observed many of their strenghts, like all churches, there were some weaknesses as well. In the hour and a half or so that I was there, with the exception of the pastor who I personally know, only one person came to shake my hand, welcome me or even attempt to speak to me. This one person came, shook my hand, said God bless you, then turned and walked away. There was really no attempt to get to know me or to inquire if it was my first time visiting. I share this particular weakness, not to ridicule or speak badly of this church, but to honestly admit that I have been guilty of this weakness as well as are many churches. I left that service with a renewed committment to greet and to speak to as many people as I possibly can in our services. I pray that this experience will help me to better myself in welcoming both our regular attendees and our guests and to make them feel at home.
Well, these are just a few thoughts that were sparked as I visted this great church. I’m curious, what have you observed as you’ve visited other churches? What things, both positive and negative, did you come away with as a result of visiting a church other than your home church?
Paul Wilkinson said,
August 29, 2008 at 2:11 pm
Though I’m not a pastor, over the past two years, I visited 31 out of 35 churches in our ‘twin-towns’ community. I found it an enriching experience to see firsthand how different people worship.
Your first point: Don’t let some “ministerial ethics” tradition stop you from doing this again. I own a couple of Christian bookstores, and one time another store owner got all tense because I dropped into his store to say ‘hi.’ There’s already too many walls in the Body of Christ; be the guy who lives like they don’t exist.
Your second point: Guess what? You’re human. It’s normal to see the toys somebody else has and want to play with them. But the recent data is telling us that the smaller, simpler, more intimate churches are often having the most effective ministry over the longterm. And the first century church had no special lighting; at least not that is recorded anywhere.
Your third point: Very few churches have people who have either the training or the motivation to seek out first-timers and engage them conversationally. In the 31 places I visited, the warmest reception I got was from a breakaway Catholic group; which surprised me as an Evangelical. My own church has a “three minute rule.” In the first three minutes after the benediction you are only allowed to speak with people you don’t know.
robsjourney said,
August 29, 2008 at 2:25 pm
Paul, I appreciate your comments and I appreciate the perspective in which you give them by. I have to say, that I absolutely love what you wrote: “There’s already too many walls in the Body of Christ; be the guy who lives like they don’t exist.” I will take those words as a personal challenge. I also like the “three minute rule” that you spoke of. I believe that is a very practical tool that churches can utilize to get their people intentionally reaching out to visitors and guests.
Steve said,
September 4, 2008 at 7:11 am
Rob – way to be open with your feelings. Comparison is a horrible indicator of success isn’t it? I think we all identify with those feelings, whether from the church perspective or from a personal perspective. Bigger house, nicer car, more expensive clothes….full, flowing, stylish hair or bald…ok I’m just spilling now
Love you bro – great post!